I am trying to remember some songs people used to sing in school., mostly sung to other tunes. I could only remember a few. Isn’t it funny how a lot of the games/songs/rhymes are rather, uh, rude/crude? I think these would get you kicked out if you sang em in school now!!

(sung to ‘Joy to the world’)
Joy to the world, the teacher’s dead.
We barbequed her head!
What happened to the body? We flushed it down the potty! And round and round it goes!
And round and round it goes!
And rou-ound! and round, and round it goes!

(Sung to ‘deck the halls’)

Deck the halls with gasoliiine!
fa la la la la, la la la la
Light the match and watch it gleam!
fa la la la la, la la la la
Now the school is burnt to ashes!
fa la la, fa la la, fa la la
Aren’t you glad you played with matches?
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

Then there’s

Jingle bells, Batman smells,
Robin layed an egg!
The batmobile lost a wheel,
and Joker got away- hey!

And…


I remember the ‘you can’t get to heaven’ one, only all the lines rhymed, like
“Oh you can’t get to heaven on a rollerskate, cause you’ll roll right past the pearly gates!”
Oh you can’t get to heaven with ???? I can’t remember any others.

I also know the ‘web-footed friends one. I heard it on Tiny Toons, Plucky Duck sang it. It went:

Be kind to your web-footed friends
For a duck may be somebody’s bother
Be kind to your friends in the swamp
For the weather is ve-ry damp
Well, you may think that this is the end
And it is.

And I heard this one different:
3 6 9
the goose drank wine
the monkey sat on the street car line
the line broke
the monkey got choked
and they went to heaven in a little row boat?

They actually sang part of that rhyme in the song “Red Red Wine”. It was also in a Stephen King book, “Insomnia”.